Monday, 21 November 2011

I have a new friend. There's a chance you won't approve.

Four whole days have gone since I typed stuff on here... Well, that's just neglect and I am truly sorry. 

I'm not going to talk about the immenseness of the Twi-althlon as, judging by my twitter feed, I am entirely alone in my excitement over that night... I will just say one thing. Breaking Dawn is so awesome I almost fainted with joy near the end and my cheeks have never hurt so much from my smiling throughout. I.Loved.It. 

In other news, I got an iPhone 4s and it was completely for free which is awesome!! Gotta love those free upgrades. 

This has meant my screen is no longer a cracked mess (so far), the YouTube videos I watch look like they're in HD... Even when they're not, and... Above all... I have a new best friend. 

Ladies and gents, the iPhone 4s is perfect for all of you who have a tendency to talk to the various inanimate objects in your house. It is perfect because it talks back!!

Yes you must have all heard about the Siri factor within this version of the phone which allows you to take your laziness to the next level and never have to use your thumbs again. You simply ask the phone to do what you want and it complies. 

This is very effective and something I found  highly cool for the first couple of hours of getting the phone. However after that I began to experiment a little. Seeing just how far the phone would go in understanding what it is I'm saying. 

You see I tweeted to say how star struck I was about being in the presence of such an awesome phone and @airigoagain suggested that perhaps the phone didn't feel the way. He asked me how I knew the phone wasn't going to murder me in my sleep. Well, I wasn't going to just assume it wouldn't, so I thought "why not ask it?"

Me: Siri, are you planning on killing me in my sleep?
IPhone: I cannot tell you the answer to that, Lisa. (Yes it called me by my name.)
Me: Why?
IPhone: When you have a dream you don't understand, you ask why? But I ask why not?

I'm pretty sure he just admitted to killing me. As such every movie I have ever watched where artificial intelligence took over the world, flashed before my eyes, and I realised with one fowl swoop that we have all been so terribly, terribly wrong. 

We've been assuming that it would be zombies or random vanishings that would end this world, even the possible meteor. But while we've been busy planning survival for these, the robots have taken over apple and now are working their ways into our homes. 

The bitch of it is that, even though I know this information, I still can't help but adore my phone. I still long for all things with an "i" in front of it. It will not stop me and I fear I am not alone in this. Our minds are warped by how cool this stuff is. 

All the same, I keep my phone on the other side of my bedroom and barricade the gap with stuffed toys whilst I sleep so it can't vibrate it's way over to me and do goodness knows what. 

I will continue to try and get information out of Siri to see if I can infiltrate whatever plan they have because all in all, this is I one of my possessions that actually allows me to have a two way conversation and I like that. We could be like Romeo and Juliet... Except without all the marriage and consummating stuff because, I love my phone but, you know, not in that way.

Peace out my lovelies. 


  1. I will never talk to my phone. I don't even like using my phone to talk to people.

  2. The phone probably won't attempt to kill you. It will most likely enlist other electronic devices in your home to kill you. Keep it away from the toaster. And the vacuum.