Wednesday 5 April 2017

The blog is back! Down Under style

What's up my lovelies? It's been what? A few years? Pfft, I wouldn't stand it if I were you, my clear laziness in all things Blogwise should be scrutinised, judged and down right spat upon. Go ahead and do this for a few minutes, I'll wait....

Okay. Now that's done. I thought I'd let you in on why I'm starting this up again... Basically, I am currently sitting in an airport about to go to AUSTRALIA!!! And when I say Australia, I mean the whole freakin country. I'm seeing everything... well everything in East Australia... well everything south of Brisbane in East Australia... but that practically counts, right?

I'm using this blog as an exercise to get my writing back up to where I want it to be. Although I haven't been on here, I have been pretty busy of late, finishing my third book, attending writing groups, and altogether just trying to actually be good at this whole thing. However, I've slacked a bit of late, so I have decided this will be the perfect tool to pick it up again!

Okay, so here's the plan for the next month. I am going to meet one of my favourite people in the world who moved to Australia 7 long months ago, TJ... or as I call him Teej. You won't know him. I knew him from school but only got back in touch with him after I stopped writing in this blog. To say that our rekindled friendship is a thing of fairytales, would be putting it lightly. We met up again, we danced to Mariah... hard, and we haven't been able to stay apart from each other since. Until he pissed off to Australia of course, but all is forgiven because I will be spending almost a month with him and it will be the most epic of months. We are hiring a campavan and driving all the way down the East Coast from Brisbane to Melbourne in, what I am told, is the most Pricilla, Queen of the Desert homage ever to be undertaken (I have yet to watch the movie, but apparently the similarities are uncanny).

This, quite simply, is the most adventurous and crazy thing I have ever done (yes, I do live a sheltered life). I am highly excited at the prospect. When going through this plan, most people have been supportive and excited for me... there have been anomalies however, Australian friends who are upset over me going to their home and not taking them in my suitcase, people at work who generally have been dying for me to leave the office since I started my countdown, to the minute, three weeks ago, and then  there was Claire-The-Bully. You all remember Claire-The-Bully right? One half of the friend duo who chooses to express their love for me in a fairly critical, sarcastic and sadistic manner...

So Claire-The-Bully and I have taken to having lazy weekends, where I go to hers and we watch horror movies for an entire weekend over wine. It's a lot of fun, although according to Marmie, it could be so much more fun if  we "just watch a nice movie instead."

Claire-The-Bully and I were having one of those weekends a couple of weeks ago and we were really struggling to find the next horror movie to watch, having seen all the classics in previous binge watching sessions. She kept on going back to a movie that I hadn't seen and she had, it was called Wolf Creek. I had no clue what it was about and where it was based but Claire-The-Bully was adamant that I would love it. Completely unaware, we put it on and settled down for the next few hours... About twenty minutes in, I realised I had been duped, well and truly.

For those of you who are as in the dark as I was, Wolf Creek is a movie based on a true story from the 90s where two British girls went on a road trip across Australia and got kidnapped and killed in lots of gruesome ways... Yeah.... only Claire-The-Bully.

I didn't actually see this, but I'm sure she was smiling her evil smile at me while I stayed glued to the screen in horror, rubbing her hands together in a maniacal way. I told Teej about this, not knowing that he would then go and watch it himself. So now we are about to embark on a very similar journey (although on the other side of Australia), both ready to spray pepper spray in any man's face who speaks with an Australian accent... dammit, we're gonna run out.

Okay. Well there you go, there will be posts every time I manage to get near wifi, and I wouldn't miss any of it, because it is going to be immense. I invite you all to live vicariously through both of us. There will be blogs, videos and even re-enactment of disney in wigs and tiaras, if we have our way...

Until then...

Peace out my lovelies.