Tuesday, 5 July 2011

Definition of irony? ... My face.

On Saturday my cousin got married. 

A week prior, the most immense film came out on DVD. 

I'm not kidding, if you haven't seen it then you need to. For more of my thoughts on this, check out my review.

Younger-Brother-Daniel rocked up at my house prior to the wedding with Older-Brother-Glyn and Marmie (mum).

He got dressed into his suit and noticed my copy of 'Never Let Me Go' placed (rather lovingly) next to my TV. 

It's permanently there due to the fact that I'm in my honeymoon phase with the film at the moment. I watch it every night and sometimes, on days when I have the time, even twice in a row. I LOVE IT SO MUCH. 

So with all that being said, you can imagine why I was reluctant to lend it to Younger-Brother-Daniel as I didn't know when I would next see him (he doesn't live close).

Younger-Brother-Daniel thought the concept of me not wanting to part with my DVD as ludicrous and he told me so... Quite animatedly... With fervent agreements from Older-Brother-Glyn and Marmie. 

All the while, every time I tried to imagine parting with it, I felt a pull at my very core. It felt like what I would imagine parting with a child would be like. As I don't have children and am massively allergic to cats I think it's a suitable substitute. 

Anyway, I kept my ground, apologised profusely for not being more helpful, adding that any of my other DVD's are available for loan. Just not this one... Not yet. 

It became a bit of a long running joke throughout the day. I was called selfish and possessive but I grinned and bared it because I believed this was important. 

Last night my brother Skyped me:

Younger-Brother-Daniel has been shortened to YBD.

YBD: So are you going to lend me Never Let Me Go or what?
Me: Oh! Did you want to borrow that? You should have said when you were here. I'd have been more than happy to lend it to you. 
YBD: Oh is that so?
Me: (Sighs) If only I'd known. 
YBD: Oh it's okay because I happen to have a copy here (holds up 'Never Let Me Go' to the screen)
Me: (laughs) Oh, so I take it you went out and bought-

I stop as my eyes fall on the empty space by my TV. I feel the blood leave my face. 

Me: Is that actually my copy you're holding?

YBD laughs. 

I hang up the phone. 

Given that that's the closest thing I have to a child and Younger-Brother-Daniel swiped it when I didn't notice, that makes what he did kidnap. I'm not ashamed to say I cried a little. 

Talk about losing something with such an ironic title. 


I'm not talking to Younger-Brother-Daniel anymore. 


  1. I refuse to send it to you.

    However, inspired by this rather warped retelling of events please expect in the mail a copy of Ben Affleck's 2007 hit 'Gone Baby Gone'

    Kind Regards


  2. Trust me, there is a revival happening. This revival will result in people coming to your house with pitchforks as everyone demands you bring my child back. You will return it.

    Oh and by the way... what about what I just said was a retell?? It was EXACTLY how it happened!!

  3. I shall also be sending you Amy Heckerling's 2000 rom com hit 'Loser'