Tuesday, 30 October 2012

The song that will save the world... one professional dancer at a time.

Well, I had an awesome wake up this morning. My alarm is my radio and just as it came on, the song Gangnam Style came on. I have discovered that if there is ever a song that will get me up and out of bed, it is definitely that song.

I started by singing along (in my best attempt at the Korean language, which is amazing by the way). By the time it came to the chorus, I found myself wiggling around in bed doing the dance moves in a laying down motion. When I realised that this wasn't fulfilling my need of fully enjoying the song, I simply had to jump out of bed and dance around my room, singing at the top of my voice "Ooooh Sexy lady! Woopah Gangnam Style!" Leaving Housemate-Anna with a little wake up alarm of her own. Soon, I found that the moves that come along with the song weren't enough either so I developed my own beautiful and highly professional moves to go along with it. This included flourishes and kicks and wiggles and jumps and splits and backward somersaults and scissor kicks in the air whilst cartwheeling over my bed to the mirror so that I could check my hair and general 'just woken up' face, but mainly to observe my own moves first hand and marvel at my amazing choreographing skills.

I would like to say at this point that I was able to look in the mirror and say, wow, I quite obviously missed my calling as the lead in the Royal Ballet Company... however, it was more me realising that my splits were not actually as impressive as I thought, apparently leaving five feet worth of gap between myself and the floor does not a split make (this being pretty impressive in itself, given that I am actually only 5 foot 1). My backward somersaults turned out to be me just jumping backwards, closing my eyes and imagining that I just jumped 360 degrees into the air when I had actually just taken a step back and landed on my bed again. My scissor kicks were a little more impressive, although the mirror was next to the wall so I found I was just causing myself damage by re-enacting these as I was just smacking the right side of my body against the wall.

So, yes. I did just end up bruising myself massively but the words I didn't understand from the song were soaring through my body and interweaved into the most excited parts of my soul and so I didn't care that I had probably caused myself internal bleeding that would have needed hospitalisation if it wasn't for the fact that I was incredibly infectious with my Ebola virus... wait... I'm pretty sure that people with Ebola aren't able to dance with such flourish... does this mean that I may in fact be healed?


Wow, that song really does fix everything...

All of this left me in such a good mood that I almost didn't mind I had made myself a beautiful coffee in my "Warning: Biohazard" flask and then left it in the kitchen instead of taking it out of the house with me. I didn't even realise until I was practically at the train station... this might have something to do with the fact that I was still singing "Gangnam style" in my head whilst doing a slightly more dumbed down version of my dance moves as I walked down the street... I think I just figured out why that group of builders were staring at me in a perplexed fashion as I passed them this morning.

I might have a word with my local radio station and ask them to play that song at the same time every morning... I am not a morning person so this was a pretty out-of-this-world, unique morning. If the song manages to cure ebola and my 26 year long inability to wake up in a good mood then I'm nominating it for a Nobel Prize... I can do that right? Do they have a people's choice category in that? If not, then they should have. I'll speak to them shortly after I've phoned my radio station...

And if I still have time after all that, I might give the Royal Ballet Company a call and ask them if they have any vacancies. If not as a dancer then I at least should get a choreographer spot.

Say it with me people:

"Ooooh sexy lady!! Ooh, ooh ooh ah, WOOPAH GANGNAM STYLE!!"

Peace out my lovelies.

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