Oh hi BTV. Welcome to my crib!

I have food in my house. It has been void of food for a while now... Like a decade. But last night, just before 9pm, a magical man in uniform arrived at my door with crates and crates of edible joy. 

It feels so good! I can't stress how empty my cupboards have been. I even ran out of baked beans! I never run out of baked beans. 

I was down to one can of tuna, a tenth of a bottle of Mayo, some slightly stale bread and a handful of pasta. That was pretty much it. 

Oh, I did have a packet of 'Skips' crisps but they had gone off a month back. I was keeping them just in case it got that bad. Thankfully I was about a day off from hitting that level of desperation. 

Anyway, I've now well and truly stocked the kitchen storage facilities of all the complex food a highly talented gourmet chef like myself needs. 







Excuse me while I go and make myself a stunning and highly complicated meal of 'du pan au bacon' heavily soaked in 'la sauce brune'. That's how I roll. 

Peace out my lovelies.