I'm not Bipolar... that I'm aware of.
You see, at the end of last year, when I was considering the possibility of introducing features into this blog, I had been so excited at the prospect of Wind Back Wednesdays. For those of you who aren't aware what Wind Back Wednesdays is all about, it's when I delve into the deepest recesses of my memories and bring out a witty anecdote for all of you lovely people to read and enjoy/get offended over/throw things at.
Out of the two features I had settled on (the other being Fancy Things Friday; where I find something Fancy on a Friday and talk about it), Wind Back Wednesdays was the one that I was most excited about. I was certain that I had loads of stories to force onto you. My excitement over this probably came out of coming up with the idea over Christmas, when I was with The-Family, and reminiscing was the norm. This coupled with the fact that I had just completed a year's worth of podcasts from the X FM Josh Widdicombe show. X FM is a local radio station in England and Josh Widdicombe has a Saturday Breakfast show. On this show, a comedian (who is fast becoming one of my favourite comedians ever) James Acaster usually comes on and talks about his "Classic Scrapes." Which is basically a series of incidents where he has got himself into trouble in the past. They are hilarious and, by far, my favourite feature on that show.
After hearing what had to be his 30th Classic Scrape of the year, I became emboldened by the possibility that I might be able to do something similar. Not scrape wise, due to copyright reasons, and also because, quite simply, I haven't gotten myself into nearly as much trouble as this guy appears to have done over his life. But I was certain that my childhood/teenage years was littered with enough witty tales that I would be able to make it into a weekly feature for the entire year.
I thought nothing of it. I introduced the feature onto the blog and, on the whole, it appears to be going well. However, after writing my fourth story of this feature yesterday, I began to think on what I would talk about the following week, and then became acutely aware that I had no other story to tell. Seriously, it's as if my memory doesn't exist and I entered this world as a 28 year old, with no past at all. This alone was daunting, but then I had the thought that even if I managed to somehow find a memory somewhere for next week, I still had the more pressing issue of then having to come up with 47 other stories after that.
This is where the panic hit. Mainly because my OCDs have kicked in with this blog since starting it up properly again, and writing in this thing every weekday is now firmly in my routine at the exact same time, every day. It will not allow me to deviate from this. That, coupled with the competitive streak I have within myself that has now told me failure is not an option, I have thrown myself into the mindset of never deviating from this feature... ever. No excuses. I will have to find the memories from somewhere.
I don't know if anyone else has experienced this, but the moment I am asked to think of a certain thing, such as my favourite film/song/food, all thoughts of any film/song/food tends to leave my brain, never to be seen again, until the person asking me the question has well and truly left my life. It's a very frustrating thing, especially when you know that you love a large amount of films/songs/food, and not only that, but that you have had many a conversation about your favourite film/song/food in the past, whereby you have given not only the answer to their question, but plenty of examples as to why you love said film/song/food. But in that moment? Nope. Nada. Apparently I have never even heard of a motion picture or the ability to make musical notes or even the very simple act of eating to survive. Instead, I just sit in a darkened room and do nothing. The mere fact that I am still living is a miracle and scientists should drag me into their labs for study.
This is what has happened since I have started this feature. I had a small amount of memories available as these memories had been what had sparked the idea of Wind Back Wednesdays. However, I have now used all these memories up and the plethora of other memories I was certain would then come flooding back on a week by week basis, in that really convenient way, have stayed locked firmly shut within my memory banks. I've attempted a Sherlock attempt of picturing it like a Mind Palace, but it appears that the door which holds the memories I need, is locked and no one can find the damn key.
So, in true "I'm-a-problem-solver-now" fashion, instead of doing myself an injury by trying to remember stuff that didn't want to be remembered, I decided I would just get other people to do the hard work for me. So I wrote a simple post on my Facebook, which holds the entire collection of my childhood friends. This post was:
"To all the people who have known me in my early years (Childhood to teenager), I need help! I need some good memories for my blog and for some reason I can't remember anything that happened! Any ideas?"
What happened after this was the most beautiful thing that has happened to me all year. My so-awesome-I-can't-even-stand-it friends, from all periods of my life, started commenting on all their own memories of past times with me. So much so, that I have now lined up stories that should at least get me to March.
One thing I will say however... After reading these memories, I have also remembered that I was a very odd girl, especially in my teenage years. I mean, "Pretending for 6 months that I was Luke Skywalker's mother" odd. So, when I do eventually start delving into the teenage period of my life, there is a chance that you all might change your opinion of me drastically... I'd apologise for it, but to be honest, I'm kinda proud of the weirdness involved... and it was the 90s. People did weird things in the 90s.
So my How To Guide to writing the best Facebook status ever consists of this: Just type in the above status... Sure, there might be a period of about 6 hours where no one replies and you start to hate yourself a little, but eventually it will pick up and soon endless fun and reminiscing with people you haven't spoken to in years will ensue. Enjoy it. Try not to think about how slightly egotistical the whole post sounds... especially as it's basically just you asking other people to talk about you... If you say it's for a valid thing like a blog or something similar, it makes it less "attention-grabbing" and people might tolerate it more.
You're welcome.
Peace out my lovelies.
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